You can’t imagine it, Jessie J states. There she was readying for her comeback record in nearly a decade, ecstatically in love with her recent boyfriend, and finally the mom to a little one after struggling to conceive for a decade, feeling invincible. Suddenly in March she was diagnosed with cancer in her breast.
The singer-songwriter, actual name Jessica Cornish, is renowned for speaking her mind. The album, her latest release, was supposed to be an candid account, tackling every moment of pain she’d experienced since she last recorded music (endometriosis, losing a baby, unsuccessful partnerships, psychological manipulation, suicidal thoughts) with typical candour. The lead track, the song No Secrets, was launched in the spring. But by then there existed a huge secret. Her diagnosis. Then follow-up track, her song Living My Best Life, debuted in late spring and the artist was speaking publicly about how she was thriving, while at the same time living with breast cancer. Subsequently she went public, and in early July she underwent breast removal surgery.
She shoots me her best “Seriously?” glance. “I put out with a song called No Secrets. I’m doing every press talk, and they inquire, ‘Any updates?’ and I respond, ‘Well, not much…’” the singer has just had to call off performances because she’s awaiting cosmetic procedures.
We’re at a studio in the capital. She is wearing a tan faux-leather coat, blue jeans with detailed white appliqués, off-white boots and large glasses. Think biker chic meets vintage look. “I feel like I’m in the 70s and I should have a man with facial hair.” Like the film, I say, thinking of the film. “They used to call me that!” She grins. Cornish is sharp-witted, irreverent and filter-free. She says she has always been interested in humor and is planning to attempt her standup debut next year. “I enjoy humor. During performances I basically roast the fans.”
Health Struggles and Diagnosis
Cornish was getting ready for an slot at the ceremony when she found a lump. “I quickly sought to get it checked, had an test, and they said, ‘It appears fine; you’ve got really good dense breast tissue.’ And I was, like, ‘However, it’s there. My arm hurts and numbness in my fingers whenever I wake up.’ And they replied, ‘We should biopsy it?’ It happened on March 28, the following my birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The specialist told her if it was bad news she’d call on the start of the week. By then she had convinced herself it was nothing. The way she explains it, it was simply too inconvenient to receive a diagnosis when she had so much on.
“It was a fortnight prior from releasing the album after a long hiatus and four years without a single. And the doctor messaged and said, ‘Can you talk at six?’ And I was, like, ‘Oh, it’s a Zoom, it won’t be anything.’ So I jump on the Zoom expecting it’s all going to be positive, and she informs me, ‘You might want to sit.’ The solemn tone? And she reveals, ‘I regret to inform you but your reports have come back as aggressive cancer.’” What did you say? “I replied, ‘Well, that’s not great. What awful timing.’ Immediately I felt was, ‘I have to survive for my boy.’”
I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself
She found the surgery frightening and surreal. “I fear going under. They walk you down. You know when you have emergency surgery you roll down in a bed, but this time I just strolled down with a hospital gown and my bum hanging out. You feel like you’re in an episode of Black Mirror.” But, she adds, she’s been lucky. Without chemo or radio, just the procedure. “Cancer is awful, but however I’m grateful it was caught soon. The surgery happened recently and my affected breast now looks like a fruit under fabric.” She smiles again. “I got to keep the nipple, though.”
The follow-up procedure is both medical and cosmetic. Her breasts, she observes, are now “asymmetrical. They didn’t do an implant as small as my original. So inconsiderate! I thought, no need to bully me, I’m already having a rough time. So rude! Amusingly I said I’d never get my boobs done because I’ve got obsessive tendencies, and I know they’d never be ideal. My plans were disrupted.”
Previous Struggles
She is no stranger to illness. She believes her outlook on her diagnosis has been so positive because she’s used to physical challenges. Frequently they align with peak moments, acting as a reminder, or shock, to remind her not to take anything for granted. “Frankly, I feel life goes, ‘You having a good time? Take a seat.’ Since childhood, it has always gone alongside high points for me; something severe or obscure has happened to my health.”
She reminisces to her childhood, already starting her career starring in the West End in a musical (she was selected at the age of 9). That’s when she was found to have the medical problem WPW, which can cause a tachycardia as well as lightheadedness and heart flutters. “I attended rehearsals intermittently on an IV drip, and going back into hospital at night.” She skips forward several years, and teenage Jess has entered the trio the group while attending the Brit School. “I signed my initial contract, and I had a cerebral event. Then when I was planning to release songs in recently I had a car crash and my larynx moved up and I lost my voice for a long period.”
Hey, I say, hold on, I need a moment. A stroke so young? She nods|agrees
